Stand-by

Today I'm going to turn off my heart, to anaesthetize my feelings- I'm going to stop imply myself with the world. To drown my illusion. I'm going to be in stand-by for everyone. Because if I'm not here, they couldn't hurt me again  And I'm tired of suffering and crying. Because hit by hit, I've discovered that all things really matter for me, love, friendship, sincerity and confident, are things about anyone cares.And love, we say what we say, we can't know what is now; friends, are no longer friends, maybe cognates, o probably, simply known ones. Sincerity is something  that is hidden so well that I would swear it doesn't exist, and if you give confidence,is probably you find backstabbing. 
And I know what I write isn't nice, and that don't like to think it. But as much as you want, things aren't going to change, are in that way, and we must live with it. 
 Si I will put my earphones, I will listen, one by one, all the songs of my life. I'll soak with each chord, I'll sing until lose my voice. One by one, with out skip anyone. I'm going to disconnect of reality, and I'm going to runaway of pain. And I'm going. I'm going to don't go back there. 

~Triss