Disenchanted

And one more time, I'm relegated to the background. Though I knew this was going to happen. Of course, I knew it. If it has always been so, I dont know which is the stupid detail that makes me think that this time somethings is going to change. Maybe it was my own imagination, more than your looks. My wish of feeling that they were for me, though I knew that they aren't. O my dreams against your words, looking for hidden meanings in sentences without any double sense.
But of course, you must have much fun. You have enjoyed watching my useless signs, playing with my fantastics illusions. You have got me to say what you wanted to listen, to uncover my heart for you. And then, you have despised it, just as you always do.
And now, you asked me to be something that you can't even put a name. You want me to be a toy, at least while you haven't got anything better to have fun. You ask for a right to everything, but no commitment to anything. And I'm scared about the pact of giving all I have without expecting to receive anything that is implicit in each of your words. And it scares me even more not being able to stop shaking when your voice whispers me from the other side of the phone. Though I know perfectly that that voice will never tell me the words I'm dying to hear. That that words aren't for me, and they'll never be. And I know that it's useless trying, and that I'll go into de lion's den. But you know what happens? I love you, and that's not going to change because of your indifference. And I have spent too much time thinking any unanswered whys, now is the time to start thinking why not do what I want, without thinking of those inevitable consequences.
 Aunque sé perfectamente que esa voz nunca llegará a decirme las palabras que me muero por oír.
 #Triss