All I wanted is to be wanted..

The truth is that right now I would like to run, run to anywhere, until my  lungs burn and I couldn't breath. Or maybe scream, without saying anything, but so loud that everyone could hear my voice. Screaming until get hoarse, wishing you to hear my words. Or maybe hit the walls until my  knuckles bleed and I can stop that pain that get me numb. Until all cease to be important, to get back any tear running down my cheeks. 
I only want to runaway, to lose myself, to forget... Because you know what?I don't like the way you pay me no attention. I hate your way to ignore me everyday to next, make me feel at one time as the most important person in the world.  I don't like your repetitive excuses. I don't like this silly game. I don't want anything of that. 
I want you to talk me, to look me. I want you to rub me accidentally when you see me in a hallway. I want to feel sometime that your smile is for me. I want you to look at me in the same way you look at her. I want that once, only one time, you give me the attention I offer you every second. 
I want meant to you the same that you meant to me. And I want you to know. I want you to realize. I only want you for love me. 

~Tiss

I love cold days

When it is cold most of thing happens more quickly, or arrive before. I refer to casualties. I love it to be cold. One afternoon of a lot of cold I read a love question, too beautiful for a child letter. 
I have to share that message, I won't know how to do with it. 

~Lovers of polar circle

Hate that I love you

And don't you see that I hate this? That your games and your changes of mind get me dizzy, tired me. I hate them!

And I would like saying that I hate you, but then I would lie. I can't hate you. I hate your behaviour, your excuses and your words. I hate the "yes" of today, the "no" of tomorrow and I hate even more that, the next day, not even you to know what it will be. 
I hate the afternoon waiting for you, and I hate a lot of more you not to come.
I hate create illusions, and I hate lose them next.
I hate loving your smile, I hate shaking when you speak to me and I hate don't know how to hate you.But you, I don't hate you
And I hate that this story will repeat again and again, as an endless loop. I hate feeling stupid and not to learn even though every day I receive a new blow. I hate your constant indecision that make me feel lost.
And even more, above everything, I hate know that, if you ask me for it, I would go without thinking about for a second.

~Triss

I'm not a top, I'm not made to spin

You're like a top. You round and round and round, changing your colour every moment.

Now is white, next turn it will be black, and maybe next it will be electric blue. Though I have already understand that this isn't another thing but a damn illusion, that it's only result of my imagination. That what I see isn't more than  small parts of you that are mixed with your thoughts at breakneck speed, reaching dizzy and makes me lose track. 

These thoughts, so strange and incomprehensible, that make me feel like a huge roller coaster that never seems to end.

The same thoughts that, even I will never understand the whole, make me fly on top, almost almost until it seems I can touch the sky with fingertips. But the next second, you've changed your mind, things are upside down and I fall without any control, without knowing why.

I fall, trying desperately find something to hold on, something to stop my unexplained drop, until that, suddenly, you look me in the eye and smile. And in less than a second, I get back to float above the clouds.

~Triss

Forgiven...

-It cost so much for yo to forgive him?
+ No, of course not. Really, I have the easier part of all this. Actually, I want to forgive him.
- I can't understand you. Why don't you do that?
+Because I can't do it.
- I still don't understand you. If you want to do it, why can't you?
+ Forgiving is the easy part. The hard part is up to him. He must deserve that I forgive him. And he haven't done anything to deserve it.
- But you love him...
+ Maybe, but he has shown that he doesn't love me, so that doesn't already matter.

~Triss 

Remember

It's funny how, sometimes, when you least expect it, something happens, something that completely collapses your inside.
A randomly selected song in radio, a perfume that you recognize walking down the street, or simply realize the date in wich we are.
Remember what that date meant a time ago for you, for a "we" that in gone. Even though now that date don't be nothing beyond the date of a test, or the day when you'll see a serial. Although it may only matters to me now, that you've forgotten that.
Although possibly never get to read these words, wich are only a sample of what it costs me to forget you. Although I don't know why I write, or what I'm doing. Although I know that remember the words that we said again and again, isn't going to make me stronger.
Even though I have always advocated that you can not let anything tie you or pinch you in the past. Although I know that for more than wait, your name will never appear on the screen of my mobile. Nevertheless, I guess today I had to write because I have always repeated that hope is the last thing you lost and I think that it is the only thing left for me.

~Triss

Myself

Well, this is my last craze. Probably you don't know anything about me, so I'm going to introduce myself. My real name is Beatriz, but on Internet I'm known as Triss. I'm from Spain, I'm student and I love writing. I've already got a blog, in Spanish, but I thought that this is a great way to improve my English. I know I have millions of mistakes, so if you check my, I'll be very very grateful.
I don't really know what else to say about me, but of course, you cant ask everything that you want.
Comments are love! <3

~Triss